One of the most essential qualities one must possess if we are going to truly evolve on the spiritual path is to take total responsibility for our lives, for our suffering, for our minds, for our emotions, and our egos.
Of course, it is true that terrible things happen to us all, as a counselor I see this every day, but as long as we continue to live as the victim of these events or circumstances, we will never truly live and evolve beyond our egoic nature.
It is the nature of our ego to blame, to be a victim and to defer responsibility, yet as long as we continue to live in this way, we will never become fully free, fully autonomous. But at some point on our path, when we awaken to our true nature and discover that we are one with all of Life, that we are one with God, and that God manifests through us as Us, then also that day we must admit that we are responsible for our lives.
Of course, from a relative perspective, it could be seen as absurd that we created the painful events and suffering of our lives, but if we are going to live in a way which is beyond our blaming egoic nature, we must be at least willing to take full responsibility for how we respond to our lives, to our pain, to our emotions, to our minds. As we do so, we take responsibility and actively work with ourselves in a compassionate way and we stand outside of the nature of ego. We stand empowered, in our Divinity, in our autonomy, in our inherently Free nature.